Club 3

Rules of Club 3:
#1: You do not talk about Club 3.

#2: You DO NOT talk about Club 3.

#3: If the bartender says "we're out of beer", goes berserk, freaks out, the club is closed.

#4: Only two guys to a cask.

#5: One drink at a time.

#6: No straws, no coasters.

#7: Drinks will flow free as long as they have to.

#8: If this is your first night at Club 3, you HAVE to drink.

LOST 5

Having lost contact with the Oceanic Six for so long, I wonder what my bearings will be when - rather, if - the show returns to Channel 5. We don't mind seeing more of Daniel Faraday, Charlotte Lewis and Miles Straume, nor do we mind more flashfowards, but please tell us who - or what - that Jacob is.

T3

Changi Airport's Terminal 3 is aptly huge as a hangar itself. Those steel shards hanging precariously from the ceiling look like an accident waiting to happen. Better move along quickly before Murphy's Law materializes!

You Really, Really Sure??

Not so much the driving or valet service, but we sincerely urge you to think twice about taking our breathalyzer test directly after Simon Tay :-X

Monster Energy

Speaking of the Taloned One (who?), these gaudy pink gashes on this 'prodriven' Pirelli-tyred Mxnster along North Canal Road are nothing to howl about. If anything, they're way too turbo for our liking -_-"

The One That Got Away

The only post .: Photo Finish :. has ever pulled was one titled A Beauty Above All. But here it is, back again - and for good this time.

Diana Cheok.

Satay @ LPS

35 chicken + 5 duck satay sticks - sans ketupat - for $6.00 at one of the 10 open-air (and literally roadside) atap stalls parked outside Raffles Quay's Lau Pa Sat (AKA Telok Ayer Market). Not the worst of its kind, to be sure, but at least one shouldn't have agreed hastily under the unabated hustling of Handsome Earphone Mat. Sheesh!

Heliotropism

sunsets are always such sad goodbyes...

Oscars '09 - A Précis

Hugh 'Wolverine' Jackman hosts the gala event, which this year forgoes its traditional (ceremonial) presentation in favor of a more 'refreshing and surprising' format. It works. SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE's Cinderella odyssey comes to fruition as it reigns over the field with 8 Oscar wins – the most since 2003 when LOTR3 leveled the competition with a joint-record 11. Sean Penn pins odds-on pick Mickey Rourke for the Best Actor title, Best Actress conferee Kate Winslet keeps her sensibility in check and speaks with sense, the late Heath Ledger expectedly takes the posthumous award for Best Supporting Male, Penélope Cruz as Best Supporting Female looks cute and Meryl Streep in the front row looks just plain glamorous.

8 Days

Does anyone actually give a flyin' fug that I own the premiere issue (dated October 13, 1990) of MediaCorp Publishing's flagship E&T guide? Look me up, Michael Chiang!

Cast in Copper

Not everything's cast in stone. As one can see below, vignettes from Singapore's early settlement era are immortalized (near Amoy Street) in dark glorious copper.

(Above left): A botak coolie purchasing condensed milk from an orang laut for making kopi gah dai.

(Above right): Children froclicking with a fish lantern after they ran out of firecrackers.

Whoosh!

Safety is compromised that moment you take your BMX out for a ride on the road. Bikes don't belong on the turnpikes the same way brains don't belong in the heads of stubborn mules. We are dutifully concerned.

Nabau Snake

WCP questions the authenti-city of this photo (which could very well be doctored) showing a 100-ft ser-pent snaking along the Baleh River in Borneo. As a staunch disciple of all things crypto, withal, I'd give it the benefit of the doubt. What say you?

Banana Split

Swensen's tri-flavored (guess which?) ice cream "drenched with chocolate fudge, strawberry and pineapple toppings, fresh banana slices and almonds". You won't crave pisang goreng for supper after this.

Peninsula Plaza

Like how Lucky Plaza has become the haunt for Pinoys and Golden Mile Complex the hangout for Thais, Peninsula Plaza is your Little Myanmar (derogatorily known as the Burmese Ghetto). Ask Su-Yee-Shin-Yin if you don't believe me.

Five Stones

The pinafore girls of my time were particularly good at this game, while we boys were alternately bowled over by tikam. Then again, not to digress, some five stone players are really fantabulous; the more you observe their speed and precision in throwing and catching those little sacks of rice/sand/saga seeds, the more you'll be convinced they're born to busk along the Orchard Underpass.

Ang Moh Volleyball

Dissatisfied with her coach's decision not to make her the team's libero, v-ball upstart Calista Newcomb texts her resignation as drafted earlier.

Day at the Museum

simply sms 2009 to 79777 and receive 4 free admission passes* to the singapore history and living galleries (not a spam)

*conditions apply

Amitabh Bachan

Amitabh Bachan is to Bollywood what Al Pacino is to Hollywood. The venerated actor and producer from Allahabad has been a preeminent figure in Indian cinema for the past 40 years and is regarded as a national treasure to his country. Subsequent to his brief tenure as an elected member of the Parliament (he was a longtime friend of former Prime Minister Rajiv Gandhi) and semi-retirement, the SHOLAY star and father-in-law of Aishwarya Rai returned to prominence with a successful television show, which he presented, and a string of hits including MOHABBATEIN, which co-stars Rai and Shahrukh Khan.

Another Kicked the Bucket (NC16)

Domestic helpers here die faster than houseflies, and where do we dispose of their bodies? The most convenient place, of course!4 Naw, don't worry, those idling health inspectors won't be conducting checks so regularly ;-)

The Claw

It appears Tinseltown can't keep a secret under wraps for too long. This is an unauthorized screenshot of Michael Bay's TRANS-FORMERS sequel that's leaked onto the Internet. For the curious, it's Iron Claw, a new Autobot.

The Girl with the Beautiful Smile

Anyone remembers Lin Jiajun from the sophomore season of CAMPUS SUPERSTAR? Well, I certainly do (and even cited her here). After all, who could forget that sunnier-than-Portland smile? This RJC freshie sure knows how to flash those lovely pearlies and, albeit falling short of making the final cut, she's still a bona fide winner in my book. Now, I can also claim her as my newly added 'friend'. Nice!

Speak Slowly

We know you have a speech impediment, so there's no need to hurry through a sentence stammering half the time.

Now, tell us slowly, why did you unbend the paper clip and use it as a toothpick?

AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON

5Not a pretty boy: Rick Baker's work here puts VAN HELSING to shame.

AAWIL and the other werewolf flick THE HOWLING came out at about the same time - circa 1981 - and, if you're not a fan, it's not easy to tell them apart. For me, I felt the latter was more horrifying (it gave me hallucinations), but marveled at the former's groundbreaking (non-CGI) special effects that transformed David Naughton into a beastly lycan. The AMPAS even created a new awards category at the Oscars - Outstanding Achievement in Makeup - specifically for the film.

Burn Baby Burn

"May the fires of a thousand suns immolate them in burning world of agony for all eternity..."

Spock's Wheels

Now that even annual fan conventions are as passé as the franchise itself (until J. J. Abrams saves it), enterprising Star Trek pioneers William Shatner and Leonard Limoy have evidently found their second wind with an in-name-only bicycle store near Traders.

What a Swine!

California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has his work cut out for him. While desperately trying to reconcile a multi-billion dollar deficit for America's most populous state, he's been hit with another humdinger of a hazard that's been hogging (pun intended) the headlines since late January. Nadya Suleman, the 33-year-old single and unemployed mother, had last month successfully given birth to a healthy set of octuplets (def: 8 babies) through in vitro fertilization – in addition to the 6 other below-7 children she already has – and is now facing public furor for the taxpayers may soon have to bear her exorbitant child support costs (which could very easily amount to millions).

IMHO, this is but a blatant act of temerity and irresponsibility as a parent who has no means – and, frankly, business – whatsoever raising so many kids on her own. Leave that kind of onus to the pigs.

F13

After perusing the review of the new Jason Voorhees movie by Chicago Sun-Times critic Roger Ebert, I learnt that the fear of Friday the 13th is called paraskavedekatriaphobia. That's quite a mouthful, I'd say. And were you aware that there are three such days in 2009 alone?

It's Vader Time!

Back in the salad days when wrestling was still watchable, Big Van Vader was a top WWF/WCW draw and major force to be reckoned with. Victims of his devastating Vader Splash often suffered from 'pulverized scapulas' and bled profusely from their mouths. Scary. Those who found themselves underneath the Vader Bomb...well, it's lights out. Even scarier.

But you know what's the absolute scariest? That without his crooked nose-rendering war mask, big ol' Leon White looks just like your average U-Haul trucker. Wahaha...

Palm Prints

Now, in part, we're getting a vague idea of how Han Solo might've felt when his body was frozen in carbonite.

Ayam Penyet Ria

Ayam penyet (crushed/smashed/ flattened fried chicken) at Clifford Centre's Banquet f(r)ails when stacked up against Orchard Tower's Muslim eatery on Level 4 - or formerly so(ld). The meat's too hard and cold (if only it was cash), the rice's...(supposed to be?) white. Good thing I have my bubbly teh tarik to see me through :-)

Scientology

"Our Church is not a cult... Dianetics is the answer... John Travolta can't be wrong... Tom Cruise can't be wrong... Long live L. Ron Hubbard... Long live L. Ron Hubbard... Long live L. Ron Hubbard..."

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Wayang Kulit

For tonight's cultural performance, you'll be treated to the Javanese art of wayang kulit, or shadow puppetry. We hope you'll bear with us, because at the end of it there'll be a Komodo dragon brawl.

Bueno Babe

A pack of Kinder Bueno, which contains two chocolate bars, used to be the sine qua non of a well-balanced lunch for me. These days, I'm trying to cut down on my cocoa intake - although it's good to know some folks still clamor for these savory hazelnut cream-filled wafers.

Sheepish Nish

Miss Razak must be having an Orca of time now with her new Yahama Bumblebee. VROOM!

Hogan's Sexy Leg

Oolala! Old-gan's such a sexy beast - from the haunch down to that hoof!

Click

My Toshiba zapper may not be a 'universal remote' as featured in the Adam Sandler fantasy-dramedy CLICK, which is a shame since there are so many cool stuff I could've done with it, but at least it makes channel changing/surfing a breeze. The cats can also tune in to ANIMAL PLANET whenever they feel bored.

Bruce Lee

"Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless - like water. Now you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup, you put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, you put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend."

Science Centre Super Series

5 Rexy the dinobot welcomes everybody to the world-acclaimed Science Centre Singapore. Rawl! And don't forget to take my picture!

5 Gaze into the spinning spiral and give yourself a giddy head trip. Uzumaki!

5 A space-age Powerpuff channeling the mythological Medusa? Bear-y nice!

5Dedicate a love song to your special someone through Froggy the amphibious jukebox and hear his croaky voice emanate from this enormous hibiscus.

5Parka fashion from Promod. Perfect for ice fishing in Alaska.

5The alimentary canal (left) and respiratory system (right) bring me many upper secondary school memories.

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SBC

Anyone born around my time will recognize and remember this pre-MediaCorp and even pre-TCS logo. Singapore Broadcasting Corporation, as it was called in those Jiang Long days, was a "partially privatized mass market media conglomeration, which dominated the entire television and most of the radio broadcasting industry in Singapore during its existence". No doubt, but the quality of programming back then was nothing to rave about.

Live Crabs Sold Here

Irvin's (Seafood) Cze Char restaurant at the corner of River Valley Road flaunts "huge live Sri Lankan crabs" to be killed, cooked and served as cuisine. To me, it's animal cruelty. Plain and simple. Never have I dined – nor will I ever dine – at a place where living and breathing creatures like fish, frogs and turtles are executed on the spot so that I can have my so-called 'feast'. Count me out on this one, Cujo.