Ho Seh Lah, Hossan Leong!

IMHO, Kumar and Hossan Leong are the two funniest people in our stressful (think schizo auntie on subway) city-state (no offense, Gurmit). Read reports that the recently concluded sophomore Hossan Leong Show, which guest-starred Bibik Lily Lim, was better received this time round. Didn't get see it, but can imagine all the politically incorrect send-ups.

Chicken Rice Ball

Originating from Malacca/Melaka, chicken rice of this variety is often served not as the usual scooped bowls, but fragrant balls with a tinge of ginger. (I know my description sucks, which is why I can never do a food blog if my cats depended on it.) And I 'regretfully' asked for an extra ball of rice, failing to realize that I didn't have that much chicken to go with it in the first place -_-

Mossy Idols

5This 'mossified' Amazonian-like idol in the Tan Hoon Siang Mist House greets day-trippers with its bulgy chameleon eyes O.O

5...whereas these stoned babies don't wanna hear or see you ribbing about their even bulgier bellies.

Mr. Pink's Theory on Tipping

"I don't tip because society says I have to. All right, I mean I'll tip if someone really deserves a tip, but (if) they really put forth the effort I'll give them something extra. But I mean this tipping automatically, it's for the birds. As far as I'm concerned, they're just doing their job." - Mr. Pink (Steve Buscemi)

London Bus

Recognized by their characteristic red color schemes, London buses are supposedly the only public transport taken by my Bentley-driving/ chauffeured ex-employer - or so he claimed. Never been on one myself - have you?

Mokara

"para para mokara" will sound equally rhythmic - right, aaron?

The Doings of Chupas?

El Chupa-cabra has been blamed for the latest bouts of beheadings in Mexico. More than 300 goats were decapitated over a mere two-month period and since minimal blood was found at the scenes the 'goat sucker' became the main culprit. I do hope this isn't some sick, sadistic prank perpetrated by a bovid basher.

my first skool

"my first skool is the pioneer childcare arm of the NTUC First Campus Group, with over 30 years of experience in providing quality early childhood care and education programmes. Today, we have the largest pool of full-time early childhood professionals with Masters and Doctoral degrees in Singapore. We are the largest provider of preschool education and childcare services in Singapore through our chain of centres islandwide." Who, I ask you, can argue with a juggernaut?

DND

"Let me drool on Kastari's balding pate - or I'll suck your busybody blood, instead!"

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He's Baaack!

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And this time, he better be incarcerated in a supermax. We suggest ADX Florence.

Cart 2 Cart

A couple of children's play cars parked outside an apartment unit in Boon Tiong. One can freely surmise that this particular household has (1) a set of identical twins; (2) two tots of ages not more than 2 years apart; (3) a covetous cub who craves for more and more toys because s/he's getting less and less love.

Nice Poochie Poochie~

What did this well-leashed American Eskimo Dog (am I wrong?) do to deserve a 'bruise' on its elbow? Been playful again, hur? Maybe it's in need of a nice scrubby shower - not in the sea, of course!

The Race Is On - For the 3rd Time

To be sure, the novelty has long worn off. Hamilton and homies will get to zip past the new Marina Bay Sands at 220 mph, but other than that, the only thing that could foreseeably fire up the formulaic (pun unintended) proceedings would be a pre-race striptease from the SingTel Grid Girls.

More Dinos

Dinosaurland up at Uncle Lim's fabulous Genting Outdoor Theme Park's like Site B from THE LOST WORLD: JURASSIC PARK - sans animatronic movements or a 2-cent tour by grampy John Hammond. Best part - and I'll be hard-pressed to find many folks disagreeing with me here - was the cool 15°C temperature.

Her ♥

Mrs. M going behind the lens for her shot at self-sufficiency. Say, weren't we supposed to meet and catch up on old times?

Mr. TVHead

what's missing are his antennae

The Stopover

Almost two hours after departing from the Woodlands Checkpoint, we arrived at this little 'transit town' in Johor called Yong Peng, a rest stop for travelers along the 600-mile North-South Expressway.

There, I consumed a plate of Malayan-style nasi lemak that cost RM 3.70, which is cheap if you convert it to SGD. Only thing is, they used bony chicken breast without much meat and double-fried it.

Human Magnetism

Is your body capable of attracting metallic objects like an electric iron or your grandmother's kuali? If yes, then we've got news for you: There's no scientific explanation for your 'gift', but you can make a living appearing as a 'human magnet' on RIPLEY'S BELIEVE IT OR NOT!-type shows.

Watch the Steps

Remember them well. Whoever said aerobics was as easy as sweatin' to the oldies?

Gone Fishin'

Kamikaze Ken has long vacated his dangerous vocation as a death defying fighter pilot to go fish for groupers, guppies or whatever garbage bags he can find at the unguarded breakwater. Pray that wiry rod doesn't give way!

Unleash the Maths Olympian in You!

Parents who want (their children) to break away from those mundane and monotonous MOE-sque, TYS-ish questions can check out the best-selling Maths Olympiad and Olympiad Maths Trainer series of books written by Terry Chew. I've personally browsed through a few and found them both interesting and innovative :-)

Petronas Towers - Up Close

The world's tallest twin towers captured with my still-functionable Nokia cell cam. Tried doing the same with my still-considered-new Sony Ericsson, but (even after photo fixing) the end result was a slightly golden look on these iconic 'corns' instead of their typical silvery look.

(Big thanks to the accommodating and hospitable Ah Siang for driving us all the way to KLCC just to get an eyeful of these breathtaking landmarks!)

From Singapore to Seremban and Back

...and how could I not bring back its signature snack, the Seremban siew pau? So, here they are5! (Halal chicken filling was chosen as it's not clear if pork can clear Malaysian Customs.)

Mummy's (that was the shop's name) ban mian with a different kind of veggie (which was more like leaves) that I'd never makan-ed before, but not bad!

At Genting

By the time this blog(ged-in-advance) post clockworkly appears, I (hopefully) would've survived a 6-hour coach ride to Bentong with some help from Guardian Pharmacy's Novomin.

Fairfield Methodist Church

Formerly Metropole Cinema, 1 Tanjong Pagar Road (opposite Maxwell Food Centre) is now home to Fairfield Methodist Church. A fine building with a bounty of history and a central spiral staircase that had seen much grandeur of yesteryear.

IP MAN

5Karate chop: Hong Kong action star Donnie Yen in his most commercially successful role to date.

It's often said that fact is stranger than fiction, but for the case of venerable martial artist Yip Man (1893-1972) it's his glorious and galvanizing 'semi-biographical' (read: fictional) story that lifts the Wing Chun master from Foshan, Guangdong, above the otherwise perceived ordinariness of an opium addict practicing on a wooden dummy.

Don't get me wrong, for I'm full of respect for Bruce Lee's sifu - but mainly because the recent films depict him as an indefatigable folk hero in the ranks of Wong Fei-hung and Huo Yuanjia. This only goes to prove (further) that movie-making has its way of taking liberties with a subject matter and, if done correctly, turning gallium into gold.

Stray Cats 5

Vagrants of Indus Garden.

Internet Filtering

The Censorship Review Committee here's proposing the use of filters in place of the present 100-site ban when it comes to Internet content. Wowzers, really? As many as 100 websites have been blocked from our access? I bet most of them are dealing in pornography.

The Sentry

"Halt right there, mortals! No passage hereafter unless you've got a more muscled midriff than me."

Sulky Boi

Simply because mommy refused to buy him kid-sized Vibram® FiveFingers® for school. And since acting like a spoilt brat by sulking away won't help, Ah Boi here will have to content with his regular pair of white canvas Bata footwear. Bo bian.

"For Relaxing Times..."

"make it Suntory time". Remember who said that? No, it wasn't George Clooney. Just a question: Why does this Japanese brand of whisky employ only American celebs to appear in their commercials? Considering the Nippons won't even bother perfecting their English for the sake of the Yankees, this is such a peculiar (and perplexing) marketing strategy.

WFF & STF

Sashayed over to SICEC on the final day of the World Food Fair 2010 and - boy - was the place smoky! Like, couldn't they do with better ventilation?

Besides goreng cempedak, which left a pungent taste in my mouth, I also tried deep-fried stinky tofu (above). For some readers who've heard that it smells like sewer water, well, you're wrong; it actually reeks more of rhino shit from the zoo. Ugh!

Portrait of the Past 2

This black-and-white artwork by the late Lim Mu Hue, which features shadow puppetry and other performances enjoyed by the early settlers of Singapore, was recreated on a large wall and is located along the walkway within the Esplanade MRT Station between Raffles City and Marina Square. Taken on an upriding escalator.

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Zeus

Tom Lister, Jr. may be best known as Deebo the neighborhood bully in FRIDAY, but did you know that he once had a brief run on the old WWF programming as the 'Human Wrecking Machine' Zeus, an unfazable monster heel who was impervious to pain? Pretty embarrassing.

Jeebra Jeep

Best to be driven in tough safari terrains whilst expe-diting striped horsies. Not even Sir David Atten-borough will have the vaguest idea what I'm babbling about here.

More M۝۝ncakes

This set's from The Baker's Cottage based over in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. They've got a promotion now at Bugis Junction with 15% off all pastries. Do you like the carrier and box? ☺

Model Showcase 2: Janice Man

Is it surprising at all that someone who starred in a movie called LA LINGERIE is as susceptible to controversies as a lesbian in Lebanon? Janice Man, another of Hong Kong's top models (a sometime euphemism for socialite) and Angelababy's bestie-gone-bad, has also been accused of 'plasticizing' herself in the name of fame. Last heard, she's getting hitched to her fully loaded boyfriend.

Do as the Dollies Say

No offense to Pamela Oei, Selena Tan and Emmy Yong, but which self-respecting 'trainspotter' would wanna listen to what the Dim Sum Dollies have to say?

PCF

The PAP Community Foundation is the social and charitable arm of the ruling People's Action Party. Yours truly used to study at a PCF kindergarten (they also have childcare centers) in my old 'hometown' of Tanjong Pagar. No recollection whatsoever of my preschool days, which is probably just as well.